Things happen every day: deaths, births, divorce, marriage, success. Anyone will say that "life is too short" to allow negative to enter into their personal lives, my personal opinion is that saying "life is too short" is negative...so basically they've already allowed negativity to enter into their life. I'd rather think life is too much fun and fun makes time move faster, if that makes any sense at all. Changes in the family are dropping like bombs. Pregnancy, engagements, college acceptances, planning, moving, and a wedding. It comes at us really fast, but I think that we're handling everything a lot better than most families like mine would. Some may say that we're a broken family-since half of us live in Utah, there has been drama between every daughter/son/sibling. We've pulled ourselves out of a lot of "sticky situations" and surprisingly we haven't broken yet. I would say we're pretty tight-knit, strong family and it's hard to get in between our bonds of steel.
Among all of these spring happenings, however, I've forgotten all about my plans for financing my dream. It's not that I'm being irresponsibly, I think I'm choosing to have as much fun as possible to avoid stress build-up. The one thing I cannot handle well is stress.
Stress: physical, mental, or emotional strain or tension. The four words I can't bare to hear in a conversation. With graduation coming up and my acceptance to my number one college-I've been slacking off on my school work (no particular reason right?) and I'm just beginning to realize how much stress I'm putting on myself. So instead of doing my work I decide to rid myself of these thoughts...and tasks. I take a walk, shower, write etc. Anything but that stressful work is fine by me. Of course, this means I've been spending more money. Money that I should be saving for a car and two school's tuition. You can see how much stress there is already. What to do, where to go etc. I'm beginning to worry that I might not be able to afford my cosmetology school to begin with! My trip to Utah will hopefully shed some light on a new job, and a great plan for me to get up the money to buy a car and pay for my first payment of tuition at Paul Mitchell.
People here in Palo Alto, I think, are addicted to stress. My mom has the perfect case of this sickness. She's always outdoing herself (in a good way), but, this makes her freak out sometimes, breakdown and what not. I'm learning from Palo Alto-inians that less is more. Life IS too short to be adding more time you don't have to your schedules, whatever happened to just enjoying the nighttime sky for fifteen minutes? Or daydreaming for a few minutes...or hours in class?! Living isn't for constantly doing something, it's for your own enjoyment right?
Living out Loud...it's hard to do, to live with no regrets, more laughter and more tears than there are hours in a day. I don't like eating more than my stomach can handle, allowing myself to do more tasks than my brain can handle. I'm making a personal pact to take things easy until Graduation. The only way to be stress free is to allow yourself to make time to just breathe, think about nothing for a few moments. Meet someone you'd never be inclined to talk to. I always that living your life to the fullest meant you're never home. No, it just means enjoy your life how it is, if you think it's dull spice it up a little. You can live life to the fullest by just enjoying your surroundings. I enjoy how my life is right now, I want more things than I can have and hopefully by the time June rolls around I'll slowly be working my way towards owning those things. Until then, I'm going to start enjoying my life, rather than doing something that just bores me to tears.
Wednesday, March 31, 2010
Friday, March 26, 2010
The Giggle Massacre
Six months ago you would never be able to tell that my shape comes from my entertainment. I had no shape as of six months ago to be honest-bad relationships will do that to a girl. It is my five month-a-versary that I have been "keeping fit" by my multiple attacks of giggling. I never realized how great life was until I was alone and realizing I had been treated like trash for the past year. Liberating yourself is the key to happiness, but, one can never forget the intense outcomes a crush can have on someone's laugh intake.
It was one month to date that this guy decided to approach me. I had confessed my intense crush on him to my step-father (official in May) and annoyed him to get him to agree on a date. It never happened and I allowed my crush to dwindle--I never lost it though--and I realized that if he won't have me then he's missing out on one special girl, words from the wise? It's ironic because I met him when I was dating my loser ex, harsh but true, about a week before I flew off to Central America for a two week trip. I had my eye on him when we exchanged hellos. Even though my hello was a little hushed and muffled from the pool water being splashed in my face and my wonderful cousins wanting to swim with me some more. It was quick, but I knew for a fact this introduction wasn't to be a ''one night stand'' introduction. I was right, he was close to my step-brother, Dylan and it seemed as if they were inseparable over the course of the summer. Another run in with this McSteamy was around 9 am. A stupid and immature fight with that one of a kind little boy I was seeing left me in my over-sized D.A.R.E shirt, and my very very short P.J bottoms--what is a girl to do after a fight with a boy?!--I was awakened at 7am by the truck rumbling to life and hearing voices and things being thrown into the bed. I thought it was the gardeners...boy was I wrong. After dozing off for two hours I'm awakened again by my mother, step-brother and McSteamy. I drag my feet out of bed, contact-less...blind as a bat and my hair piled on top of my head...probably makeup smeared all over my face? I don't recall.
"GOOD MORNING MEREY MISS!" my overly chirpy mother adores this phrase early in the morning.
"Hi." as I walk to the fridge to scope out my breakfast my eyes widen as I saw the two tall men standing at my counter.
"Oh..hi guys" My attire couldn't be worst I thought. Many arguments with my boyfriend at the time shot through my head "YOU WORE THOSE AROUND HIM?! HOW COULD YOU?!" I pushed them away and coming up empty handed with food I grumble over to the computer hutch sit on the ground and read the texts he sent me last night.
I eye a nectarine and go in for the kill...maybe if I'm fast enough they won't catch my appearance. Dead wrong. Again. My mother decides to force me into conversation, I'm more than positive they thought I was glaring at them since I had to squint to see my opponents. I give them rude short answers to each question, each topic and I pretend to be engaged in the conversation as I eat my nectarine and check my phone--I was such a guy that day.
I knew from that moment that I admired McSteamy's presence and I enjoyed having him around, even though I was a complete stuck-up brat.
A few more run-ins popped up throughout my relationship with the "little boy" and a crush had secretly developed in my brain. Knowing that my relationship was a dud 3 months prior to the break up I started to think about my options and possible admirers. Yes, "McSteamy" came through my head a couple of these times. Finally after I became single I annoyed my step-father and told him that he has to fix this thing up. I wouldn't say he failed because McSteamy did come around. Of course weeks before he leaves for two years, but he still chased after me. Throughout our communications I don't think there was a dry eye and I realized a good friendship was forming, he held the giggle massacre, and it hasn't even stopped despite his absence.
I've been noticing how much better life has gotten for me, how this guy who appeared in my life, my plans for post-graduation are getting clearer as the days pass and the fact that my whole family is finally united in some way or another.
You need a giggle massacre, led by some cute guy who will be gone before you know it, physically gone...hopefully whoever gives you this great defeat will remain close and a good friend. My giggling has brought me to the conclusion that life isn't about how much money I should be making, where I rank with friends. My friends should all be equally ranked, my money will come and go but my smiles, my laughs, and my giggle massacres are what will glue me back together when I feel broken.
It's never too late to get started on making yourself happier. Maybe developing a crush can start you off to a never ending, high carb-causality, giggle massacre.
Enjoy!
It was one month to date that this guy decided to approach me. I had confessed my intense crush on him to my step-father (official in May) and annoyed him to get him to agree on a date. It never happened and I allowed my crush to dwindle--I never lost it though--and I realized that if he won't have me then he's missing out on one special girl, words from the wise? It's ironic because I met him when I was dating my loser ex, harsh but true, about a week before I flew off to Central America for a two week trip. I had my eye on him when we exchanged hellos. Even though my hello was a little hushed and muffled from the pool water being splashed in my face and my wonderful cousins wanting to swim with me some more. It was quick, but I knew for a fact this introduction wasn't to be a ''one night stand'' introduction. I was right, he was close to my step-brother, Dylan and it seemed as if they were inseparable over the course of the summer. Another run in with this McSteamy was around 9 am. A stupid and immature fight with that one of a kind little boy I was seeing left me in my over-sized D.A.R.E shirt, and my very very short P.J bottoms--what is a girl to do after a fight with a boy?!--I was awakened at 7am by the truck rumbling to life and hearing voices and things being thrown into the bed. I thought it was the gardeners...boy was I wrong. After dozing off for two hours I'm awakened again by my mother, step-brother and McSteamy. I drag my feet out of bed, contact-less...blind as a bat and my hair piled on top of my head...probably makeup smeared all over my face? I don't recall.
"GOOD MORNING MEREY MISS!" my overly chirpy mother adores this phrase early in the morning.
"Hi." as I walk to the fridge to scope out my breakfast my eyes widen as I saw the two tall men standing at my counter.
"Oh..hi guys" My attire couldn't be worst I thought. Many arguments with my boyfriend at the time shot through my head "YOU WORE THOSE AROUND HIM?! HOW COULD YOU?!" I pushed them away and coming up empty handed with food I grumble over to the computer hutch sit on the ground and read the texts he sent me last night.
I eye a nectarine and go in for the kill...maybe if I'm fast enough they won't catch my appearance. Dead wrong. Again. My mother decides to force me into conversation, I'm more than positive they thought I was glaring at them since I had to squint to see my opponents. I give them rude short answers to each question, each topic and I pretend to be engaged in the conversation as I eat my nectarine and check my phone--I was such a guy that day.
I knew from that moment that I admired McSteamy's presence and I enjoyed having him around, even though I was a complete stuck-up brat.
A few more run-ins popped up throughout my relationship with the "little boy" and a crush had secretly developed in my brain. Knowing that my relationship was a dud 3 months prior to the break up I started to think about my options and possible admirers. Yes, "McSteamy" came through my head a couple of these times. Finally after I became single I annoyed my step-father and told him that he has to fix this thing up. I wouldn't say he failed because McSteamy did come around. Of course weeks before he leaves for two years, but he still chased after me. Throughout our communications I don't think there was a dry eye and I realized a good friendship was forming, he held the giggle massacre, and it hasn't even stopped despite his absence.
I've been noticing how much better life has gotten for me, how this guy who appeared in my life, my plans for post-graduation are getting clearer as the days pass and the fact that my whole family is finally united in some way or another.
You need a giggle massacre, led by some cute guy who will be gone before you know it, physically gone...hopefully whoever gives you this great defeat will remain close and a good friend. My giggling has brought me to the conclusion that life isn't about how much money I should be making, where I rank with friends. My friends should all be equally ranked, my money will come and go but my smiles, my laughs, and my giggle massacres are what will glue me back together when I feel broken.
It's never too late to get started on making yourself happier. Maybe developing a crush can start you off to a never ending, high carb-causality, giggle massacre.
Enjoy!
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